The authors talk about different myths of marriage. They say that some people expect everything in their relationship to get better once they get married. Not so, good soldier. Not so.
- Marriage is filled with both enjoyable and tedious tradeoffs, but by far the most dramatic loss experienced in a new marriage is the idealized image you have of your partner.
- Many things improve in relationships, but some things become more difficult. Every successful marriage requires necessary losses, and in choosing to marry, you inevitably go through a mourning process.
- No matter whom we fall in love with, we sooner or later fall out of love if the relationship continues long enough. This does not mean that we cease loving our partner. It means that the feeling of ecstatic love that characterizes the experience of falling in love always passes.
- An attorney that handles a number of divorce cases [said] that the number one reason two people split up is that they refuse to accept the fact that they are married to a human being.
- Most of the complaints about matrimony arise not because it is worse than the rest of life, but because it is not incomparably better.
I know, right? Pretty interesting stuff to think about. Do you agree with them? Chew on it for a while.